Process Stories vs Stories Processed, pt. I
When I was in 5th grade, a social studies test with a grade of 101 was returned to me. I was displeased, becasue I had missed one question, and gotten all the extra credit. The highest possible grade was a 103 or 104.
Yes, at the age of 10, I was bothered because I only got 101, instead of 104.
While that memory has stayed with me, I never actually picked up on something. Cue forward 15 years later, and one of my favorite college professors drops a bombshell. He informs me I'm a perfectionist. I laugh, heartily, pointing out some of the grades from my long-past freshman year.
He informs me, that to a perfectionist views anything less than a perfect grade as an abject failure. At that precise moment, the memory of the "101" came flying back to me. Ah, things start to make sense.
It would've been nice, when I think back, to have this knowledge available during say... any other point in my life. But I didn't, and I dealt with it. The problem I ran into, after college, is that I found myself trapped by my need to Do Everything Absolutely Right All The Time. It became a prison, and I didn't know how to break out.
Fortunately, that conversation with Doc helped out, and I've worked through it. I still have my moments, plenty of them, but I try not view things at such an extreme.
At least, I try.
So, I've had my head buried in these two stories for the last week for Literotica. They were both difficult, in their own way. One is a sequel - continuation - really of a story I wrote two years ago, my first story, but didn't actually send in to Lit, until last year. It's a fun little frolic and romp, with Oscar-potential written all over it.
nnnnn... not so much. But it's a nice dream. That story was a pain, because I've had it in the back of my head for a year, and when all is said and done, it's 30+ pages long. It was NOT supposed to take nights and nights of writing and re-writing, and I don't know if I necessarily like it.
The other story... well, the other has caused me some serious agita.
I had written it, originally, as a gift for a friend. A buddy of mine, who had to make a decision, and he's not handling it well. Plus, he got hit with some shit in his personal life, and I thought a nice story would cheer him.
Well, the story turned out to be something else. It's interesting, because at the 75% mark, I still had the original ending in mind, and then when I got to the final section, I knew it wasn't going to end where I wanted it. I found a way to make it work, but still... it's been a bit of a bitch.
And that story took maybe a couple hours to pound out?
And yet, it's bothered me the most.
They should be posted on Lit within the next few days. I'll give you a heads-up when they land.
More to come.
S.
--
Yes, at the age of 10, I was bothered because I only got 101, instead of 104.
While that memory has stayed with me, I never actually picked up on something. Cue forward 15 years later, and one of my favorite college professors drops a bombshell. He informs me I'm a perfectionist. I laugh, heartily, pointing out some of the grades from my long-past freshman year.
He informs me, that to a perfectionist views anything less than a perfect grade as an abject failure. At that precise moment, the memory of the "101" came flying back to me. Ah, things start to make sense.
It would've been nice, when I think back, to have this knowledge available during say... any other point in my life. But I didn't, and I dealt with it. The problem I ran into, after college, is that I found myself trapped by my need to Do Everything Absolutely Right All The Time. It became a prison, and I didn't know how to break out.
Fortunately, that conversation with Doc helped out, and I've worked through it. I still have my moments, plenty of them, but I try not view things at such an extreme.
At least, I try.
So, I've had my head buried in these two stories for the last week for Literotica. They were both difficult, in their own way. One is a sequel - continuation - really of a story I wrote two years ago, my first story, but didn't actually send in to Lit, until last year. It's a fun little frolic and romp, with Oscar-potential written all over it.
nnnnn... not so much. But it's a nice dream. That story was a pain, because I've had it in the back of my head for a year, and when all is said and done, it's 30+ pages long. It was NOT supposed to take nights and nights of writing and re-writing, and I don't know if I necessarily like it.
The other story... well, the other has caused me some serious agita.
I had written it, originally, as a gift for a friend. A buddy of mine, who had to make a decision, and he's not handling it well. Plus, he got hit with some shit in his personal life, and I thought a nice story would cheer him.
Well, the story turned out to be something else. It's interesting, because at the 75% mark, I still had the original ending in mind, and then when I got to the final section, I knew it wasn't going to end where I wanted it. I found a way to make it work, but still... it's been a bit of a bitch.
And that story took maybe a couple hours to pound out?
And yet, it's bothered me the most.
They should be posted on Lit within the next few days. I'll give you a heads-up when they land.
More to come.
S.
--
posted by The Bastard at 10:10 PM
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